Chinglish & Other Observations, Part 2

As promised... here are some more Chinglish phrases from the great city of Taipei. I love the response that I got from Part 1! One friend even printed the post off and read it to her friends when they were on a trip together! Wicked stuff! I apologize beforehand if this post ends up being as long (or even longer) than the last... I get carried away most times :)

"Teacher so good, Lahhhhhhh?"
Translation: This is my new favorite. The students in my one class have started to add "Lahhhh"" to the end of everything: "No you can't, Lahhhhh?" "Teacher I have use, Lahhhhhh?" (this contains more Chinglish than Lahhhh, obviously)... It's pronounced like "Lah" but they drag the ending up as if to be asking a question. I have dissected this with other teachers and here are two interpretations:
1 - It could be compared to the Canadianism "eh?" It's asking for verification through question form. In other words: "teacher, my work is so good, isn't it?" There's no room to argue here, the only answer is: "yes! it is."
2 - In order to form a question in Chinese, you must add "ma" to the end of the sentence. I believe that my students may be bringing this over in their heads when translating to English and just throwing "lahhh" in there at the end...
Whatever the reason may be, it's hilarious to listen to and very difficult to correct!

"I can eat now, Lahhh?"
Translation: there's that "Lahhh" again. My students form questions in the strangest ways. Instead of switching the "I can" to "Can I"... they add "Lahhh" and raise the last syllable of the phrase in the way that we ask questions in English. It's often hard to tell if they're making a statement or asking a question.

That's all the quality Chinglish I have for right now. As for "Other Observations," I've got some very entertaining excerpts from my multiple visits to Veteran's General Hospital last week. Before you worry, I was just getting testing done all week for my lovely screwed up stomach (that I'm sure most of you have heard about on more than one occasion).

Visit #1
alone, trying to figure out where to check-in, already been yelled at outside for parking my bike "illegally," finally find where to bring my doctor's referral... the woman calls someone... I'm sent to another building. I wander to Floor 12F... realize I have no idea how to read the door names so I stand helpless for about 10 minutes before a woman approaches me, takes the papers from my hands and brings me to where I need to be (Kate and I have learned that if we look as helpless as possible, someone who speaks English usually comes up and helps us - this saves asking everyone you see if they speak Chinese). Meet with the doctor, he orders tests, I go downstairs and try to figure out how to pay... finally I pay. Then I try to figure out how to pick up my prescription... finally get that done (by again, looking helpless)... finished for the day!

Visit #2
Kate accompanies me (awesome cousin that she is). I've already been fasting for 2 days so I'm completely disoriented. We get to the correct building and correct floor (huge accomplishment). We enter a waiting room full and I mean FULL of old people. There's people chugging these mixtures left right and centre... I'm worried I'll have to do that. We quickly realize that the nurses don't speak any English. Convienently... a man pops out of no where and offers to translate. perfect! I now spend 5 minutes explaining to this stranger that yes, I've been fasting; yes, I'm all 'emptied out'... meanwhile he's telling the nurse all this in Chinese and all of the old people in the waiting room are listening intently. I'm mortified of course.

After a couple shots of God knows what into my arm... (in the waiting room of course... everything pre-treatment seems to be done in the waiting room for efficiency reasons I'm assuming) I'm hoping that I'll soon be knocked out for the test... I'm brought into the procedure room... nope, no anesthesia... no nothing. Apparently I was supposed to ask my doctor for that weeks ago... That's the Taiwanese hospital efficiency for you, if you don't request and pay specially for anesthesia... you don't get it (at least for these types of tests).

Visit #3
Kate and I arrived later that week. While we're waiting in the waiting room, we're talking to each other... a man sitting in front of us turns around and says loudly with a raise of his hand: "KEEP SILENCE!!!" hahaha. We lower our voices a bit and then he turns around again.. this time to give us the "thumbs up"!

My turn.. someone offered to translate again (so handy!)... I was given throat spray (along with 5 other people in the waiting room... "assembly-line medical care" I like to call it). Kate and I walk into the procedure room and we're met with an old man with no pants on... we immediately start laughing and turn away, but he just pulls his pants up and walks out of the room saying "it's okay, it's okay" in Chinese. They really rush you in and out here! geez!

Time for the last test... a sonograph. Kate and I wander until we find where this test takes place. The humorous part of this test was that the entire time, Kate and the doctor played "Name Laura's Organs." Kate was testing her knowledge of anatomy and the doctor was educating her further... meanwhile I'm hoping nothing is wrong with me!! haha

All in all, I came out pretty clear! So again, no need to worry. To sum up my impressions of the medical system here (for those of you that skimmed, I don't mind:) ):
- Confidentiality is nonexistent... I had people in the waiting room asking me what's wrong... what are my symptoms and telling me ALL about theirs!!
- Efficiency comes first (which is understandable, given the population of this place!) This is apparent in the "Assembly Line" way of running tests
- For the most part, even testing rooms have an "open door policy"
- Everything is extremely well organized but appears to be utterly chaotic

Now that you've got a nice insight into some of the medical care here, I'm off. This weekend Kate and I are heading to Kenting, the southernmost part of Taiwan, for a 3-day music festival called: Spring Scream. We can't wait! My best to everyone!!