stranger in a strange land

Here are some funny things that have happened to me this week:

I went to a place to order my favorite dessert here in Taipei: Taro in grass jelly (usually with sweet potato or red bean). I figured since Taro root is native to Taiwan (or something like that) the Chinese name would probably just be "Taro." I asked the employee for some "Taro" and it turns out my reasoning was wrong... there is a different Chinese name for taro root. As a result, the girl had no idea what I was asking for, realized that I barely spoke Chinese, froze in horror and then started running down the street - this is no joke. I stood at the counter, shocked and quite embarrassed that I sent a girl running, while the other patrons just stared at me. A few minutes later, the girl returned with a man - I'm assuming his purpose was to translate. However, the man's English was as bad as my Chinese so I ended up just pointing at a picture and hoping for the best.

Yesterday was a beautiful day, the temperature reached 30 degrees Celsius and so I wore a sundress (as I do most summer days). The responses I got at each job were quite funny. The teachers at the kindergarten couldn't believe that I stood in the sun while the kids played at recess (I just wanted a tan!) and the students kept saying "Teacher, so beautiful!" Perhaps the funniest comment came from a ten-year-old student of mine who usually doesn't see me in anything other than my red uniform t-shirt. She stopped, stared with an open mouth and then said quite seriously, "Teacher, you are HOT!" I immediately laughed but she maintained a serious face. I think she meant "Teacher, you're wearing a dress because it's hot outside" but it was funny in Chinglish.

Last night I was meeting a friend to see a play at the Taipei American School. I was early so I went to the store beside the school to kill some time. While I was browsing in the store, a small boy (couldn't be older than 2 years) came up to me (he measured up to my mid-thigh) and looked up and gaped. I've become pretty good at ignoring and/or not noticing stares by now so I continued on browsing the store. Suddenly I felt a hard smack on my left thigh, he whacked me! The little 2 year old just up and hit me! I was at first stunned and turned to look at him. He just continued staring. I started laughing and then continued on my way.

Oh, the hilarity of being a stranger in a strange land.